http://www.thevalleyonline.net/ The Valley Online - humor and stupidity en-us Nucleus CMS v3.22 © Weblog http://backend.userland.com/rss http://www.thevalleyonline.net//nucleus/nucleus2.gif http://www.thevalleyonline.net/ http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=308 "I'm sorry sir, you're going to have to leave your deoderant here, unless you have a ziplock back to put it in." I looked at the guard with mild amusement thinking that surely he was kidding. I had looked up what the restrictions were on the T... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=308 Sun, 17 Jun 2007 01:56:42 -0500 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=288 The other day, no one asked me, "John, what are some good things to know about when taking a road trip with you?" Well I'm glad no one asked me because now I have a column that I can share with my wonderful reader. Here's just a few of the thing... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=288 Thu, 8 Feb 2007 20:48:37 -0600 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=299 A good long while ago I worked for a company called AudioNet. They then changed their name to Broadcast.com and went public and made a lot of people money. A little while later they got bought by a search engine company that was named after some... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=299 Mon, 8 Jan 2007 15:21:21 -0600 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=273 When I was twelve, I received my first chain letter in the mail. I never knew who it was from, but for some reason I believed every word of it. I made ten copies and mailed it off to random people. I think I even stuck some in the mailboxes of ... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=273 Sun, 9 Jul 2006 23:33:55 -0500 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=266 Every couple of years or so, my family goes up to visit my wife's sister in Salem, Illinois. It usually is cause for some interesting stories, but it wasn't until this last trip that I decided to write about some it it. Mushrooms Every tim... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=266 Tue, 25 Apr 2006 23:18:30 -0500 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=263 Although I'm glad for the opportunity to go and hang out with people and get annoyingly drunk, every time I am about to go to a party I get a sinking feeling in my stomach. You never know if a party is going to be good or if it's one of those tha... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=263 Sat, 25 Mar 2006 00:24:44 -0600 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=254 A few weeks ago a friend of mine asked me how my blog was doing. I thought for a minute about what blog he could be talking about and then realized that it was this thing I write online. I grumbled something about fucking off and that it wasn't ... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=254 Sun, 26 Feb 2006 23:55:31 -0600 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=246 When I was younger I very much wanted to be Michael Knight from Knight Rider. Not because I liked David Hasselhoff (those of you in Germany that swoon over him, don't take that as an insult he's just not my mug of beer) but because I really wante... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=246 Sat, 3 Dec 2005 14:12:26 -0600 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=230 I've been thinking about this for awhile and I wanted to float a theory out there to my small number of listeners. Actually, I'm just going to present it to those of you who will support me on it. That cuts down my audience to about a quarter. ... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=230 Tue, 27 Sep 2005 22:07:13 -0500 http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=202 Vodka and Tequila. If you really try hard you can probably make that sound really evil. Like if you pretend Vodka is the name of a Russian Mob, you could say something stupid like, "Vodka is going Tequila (pronounced ta-kill-ya)". Regardless of... General http://www.thevalleyonline.net/index.php?itemid=202 Sun, 31 Jul 2005 00:33:00 -0500